There is an expression: As above, so below.

To understand the universe, one needs only look at things on the planet, such as: Throw a pebble into a still body of water, and it will produce ripple effects.

So, in the grander scheme of things, the ripple effects of the Big Bang and other pebble events in the universe have produced  — and still produce — ripple effects in the ocean that is the universe.

Call them ripples, call them waves . . . they are what they are, and are no surprise.

Until the “chirp,” apparently. That’s supposedly the sound of two black holes becoming one — sexual intercourse, black hole style?

Indeed, I have often thought that pictures of galaxies with all the gaseous-like white stuff floating around them looked suspiciously like freshly ejaculated sperm et al . . . as above, so below, yes?

Which all goes to say I don’t have a clue why scientists are expressing almost orgasmic delight about the recent “discovery” of some celestial “chirp,” or gravitational wave as they are calling it.

Yes, I know I am a natural blonde, but hey folks, we’ve known about gravity on the planet for a very long time now . . . Duh . . .

And in the long run, will this latest great discovery answer the two biggest questions man has been asking all along: what is the meaning of life, and what happens to us after we die?

No, it doesn’t . . .

— Jillian