“The power of art and the new perspectives drawing brings are inestimable.”
— Colette Coughlin
“Pose naked? I could never do that!”
At least a dozen people responded that way to me when I told them I had posed for a group of artists in a “figure drawing” workshop focusing on body acceptance. Some of them cited body image issues — “I wouldn’t want anyone to see this body naked!” It didn’t matter to them when I explained that the workshops need models of all shapes and sizes and ages, and that first-time models are welcome. It didn’t matter to them when I explained that the workshops help people overcome body image issues, and leave you feeling empowered. They just wouldn’t hear of it. Yet, all agree that beauty is only skin deep, and that it really doesn’t matter to them how other people look . . .
*******
Photojournalists have told me – quite proudly — over the years that the camera doesn’t lie. But, as I have come to understand recently, that statement is not entirely accurate: the camera can accentuate, and distort, things in life that most people would see as irrelevant, or barely perceive at all in daily interaction. No matter how much of an artist the photographer may be, the camera itself is an impersonal object that can only capture what is on the surface at a given moment in time, leaving lasting illusionary impressions.
So, why am I talking about photography in a post about an artists’ sketching workshop on Nude Modeling and Body Image? Because I don’t like that the camera shows the lines of time carved into my face as if they were the crevices of the Grand Canyon, but I do like the fact that the artists who sketched me in a nude modeling session did not perceive those lines to be significant enough to draw into their images of me. I wish they could do sketches for my driver’s licence, medicare card, office pass and all the other ID pics I need.
*******
I was contacted by one of the hosts of the workshop, Colette Coughlin, through the Ottawa Naturists organization, of which I am a proud member. Regular readers know I have been writing a lot about social nudism this year, and about how it promotes body acceptance while at the same time liberating one from the many confines of the textile world. It makes sense that Colette and her workshop colleague, Paul Davidson, would turn to a naturists’ organization for nude models; we’re not shy about nudity.
Colette has been doing this for a while, in Ottawa and Montreal.
“I have been running this independently for nearly 10 years out of my personal need to draw the human body and learn to accept my body, and over time several individuals have joined to help me publicize and host the workshops,” she says.
“This is a not-for-profit venture whose goal is to honour the human body in every shape and size. It allows the artists to work with a variety of models and gives others a chance to gain modelling experience or just take the plunge once to see how they feel about themselves in front of a group of people whose main purpose is to draw their bodies, which is very different from gawking at someone’s nudity. Most models walk away from the experience feeling accepted, empowered, and just plain surprised how much more difficult it was thinking about doing it than actually doing it.”
But it’s not always about drawing for Colette and Paul: sometimes they have to do the posing when the scheduled models cancel at the last minute.
About eight to 14 artists attend each workshop at the Belgo Building in Montreal, paying a nominal $5 entrance fee that helps to cover the cost of the room rental.
Says Colette: “The artists are men and women of different ages, some are art students, but most are not, both French and English. Some come every week, others only once in awhile. A few are professional artists practising their skills, but most are amateurs who come for the pleasure of drawing the human form. We advertise by posting our little homemade flyers around college and university campuses and in art stores… the rest is word of mouth. A newly practising sexologist who challenged himself to pose for our group sometimes suggests the experience to some of his clients who have body image issues.”
But it’s not all about art for the artists. For some, it is also about personal body acceptance. I asked Colette why the artists don’t remove their clothes, too.
“If we were a naturist organization running the workshop, we would certainly consider inviting the artists to be nude as well,” Colette says.
“I think it’s important to let everyone explore at their own pace, and many people are just not ready for naturism, so our invitation, to artists AND non-artists, is simply to draw the body, to observe different bodies, to contemplate them over a three-hour period of sketching. Although it’s invisible, the power of art and the new perspectives drawing brings are inestimable. As opposed to a naturist activity, for the artists, something subtle shifts in the way they’re seeing the body rather than in the way they’re being seen… it’s a safer way to begin the process, perhaps, than taking the plunge and standing up front (modeling).
“It also happens quite often that after drawing for several sessions, people on the artist-side of the equation decide to take the plunge and request to be the model for a future session.”
*******
I must confess that I was careful about what I ate in the two weeks leading up to my modeling session. Not that it made much of a difference: I was not transformed into Snow White by cutting sweets from my diet. Yes, I suppose there is a contradiction: I knew the artists would accept me no matter my size or appearance, but I wanted to try to look my best, anyhow.
I looked forward to the session, and I did some research on nude poses. There are four basic poses – standing, sitting, reclining and semi-reclining – and I was expected to do variations on each of them. There would be about 20 poses in all over a three-hour period, ranging from short ones at 3 minutes and 5 minutes apiece to 10-minute and 20-minute poses.
Colette suggested I not plan any poses in advance, and just “wing it” during the session. But I wanted to have some planned poses, so I researched some of the classical poses on an art school site, and decided to use a few of them. I also wanted to add a modern touch to some poses, reflecting our obsession with cellphones and texting and laptops – and even the digital camera, with me taking a picture of the artists while they sketched me.
Among my other props: an Irish whistle for a cross-legged pose, an apple for my version of Eve, and sunglasses and spiky platform sandals for a few “glamor girl” poses . . .
Yes, I planned to have fun with this, because one can do that in these workshops. The model is given free rein – or free reign, if you will, unlike other workshops where nude models are told which positions to take. You can be as creative as you like, and there really isn’t a wrong pose, because the artists will sketch you in any position you take.
*******
The time finally arrived for my nude modeling debut, and there was not a butterfly to be felt in my tummy. I credit my experiences in social nudism settings with the Ottawa Naturists for that – I have no inhibitions about showing my naked body, even in a room full of clothed strangers where I am the only nude person.
To digress for a paragraph: Perhaps I am a bit of an exhibitionist – and that could be the subject of a post by itself. But I think anyone who wants to do any sort of modeling, clothed or not, is an exhibitionist to a certain degree, as are most performers and anyone – female and male – who adds a bit of sex appeal to their daily attire. Yes, indeed, the world is a stage, and we are all performers . . .
The studio itself, which is often used for dance rehearsals, has a large mirror leaning against the wall, perfect for the artists who could get different perspectives from my poses. There were about 14 artists seated on folding chairs in a semi-circle before me. A mat, blanket and cushions were laid out on the floor in front of the mirror for me, and there was also a folding chair. It was warm and comfortable.
Paul Davidson led the workshop, indicating the time limit for each pose and setting a timer.
I undressed behind a curtain in one corner of the room, and stepped out confidently.
Behold . . . la Jillian . . .
*******
We started with a series of three-minute poses, to get warmed up. I decided to go with a planned full-length position for the first one – standing in aforementioned spiky heels with arms stretched above my head, fingertips touching — to show the full scope of my body. The next pose was the opposite: I crouched in a ball to show just how little I could be. That wasn’t a planned pose – the idea for it came to me while I was doing the first pose. In fact, many of my pose ideas during the session were conceived while I was staring into space above and beyond the artists in preceding poses.
Next, barefoot, I sequed into a praying position . . . Jillian before the altar.
Indeed, moving smoothly and quickly between poses was expected of me in this workshop. Which had some disadvantages: there was no time to second-guess my poses – and there are a few I will not repeat when I do more sessions with this group. And I wish I had been a little more expressive with my hands; again, next time.
I had no trouble holding any of my poses. The most difficult was, perhaps, a 20-minute “glamor girl” pose, which you can see depicted very well by Colette in the drawing at the end of this post. But I came out of the session thinking I could maintain poses for much longer than 20 minutes, and that I would be open to doing some commercial model posing – this workshop was voluntary — if the opportunity ever arose.
The last pose I did – for five minutes — was deliberately the most provocative one. I’ve been second-guessing myself since, thinking the next time I do this, I will end with a meditational position or something more graceful. But I wanted to pay tribute to my rock ‘n’ roll influences, and to two of the people who have particularly inspired me not so much with their music but with their defiance of convention. I thought about what Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin might have done to end a session like this one. So, sitting on a chair with body facing the artists, I spread my spiky-heeled legs wide open and looked over my shoulder out the window, defiantly . . .
Riders on the storm . . .
*******
When the session was finished, the artists applauded me. It was one of several rounds of applause they gave me throughout the event. They were very appreciative. Some gave me copies of sketches — I have posted some of them here in a separate gallery. I also took photos of some of the sketches they didn’t want to part with, and have included some of them in the gallery. I am touched by the idea that some artists have sketches of me . . . will they one day be hanging in the National Gallery of Canada?
I am grateful for the experience, and empowered by it. In short, it was a blast! I’ve promised to return, if they will have me.
Yes, a model is born . . .
Jillian
If you are in the Montreal area and are interested in nude modeling for this workshop or would like to attend as an artist, please feel free to contact Colette Coughlin at mybodyisloved@yahoo.ca
A gallery of images from my session has been added. Look for them at the top of the page, or click on this link.
Oh no! That apple doesn’t have any clothes on!!! How scandalous!
But seriously, great work!
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Very impressive indeed!!! Congrats!!! & You look Fab!!!!!!!! Glad you enjoyed yourself!!! 🙂
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Reblogged this on home clothes free and commented:
Thanks for sharing your experience
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You are a real artist. Wonderful.
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Reblogged this on Thoughts while on Forest Walks.
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ALOHA JILLIAN:…… wonderful, insightful and perhaps the best post i have read by you on your blog; mahalo for the honesty, sketches and the beautiful foto….. wonderful…… glad you had such a positive experience and shared them with us….. have a mawvelous weekend….. ♥
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Well done! Congratulations for your bravery!
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Jillian. Lovely sketches of a wonderful person. Well done artists, kudos Jillian.
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Appreciated your description of the whole process, both who the group is, and your mental preparation and thoughts.
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So proud of you Jillian!
Fernie
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gongratulations on your sucess i’m glad that all your fears and aprehenions proved tobe groundless and that you found it tobe a plast
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Impressive story, I admire you for all that. Well done!
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Thank you for being such an inspiration, Jillian. I did nude modeling for the first time today, two hours for my femme feminist artists’ group when the regular model was sick. I first decided to be open to trying it after reading about your experience. I had so much fun, and it did wonders for my body image to see there on paper the beautiful person others see when looking at me.
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Congratulations, Madeline. I’m so happy for you!
Cheers
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I think you did something that takes A LOT of gut, I am one of those people who could never pose nude, I have too many ugly stretch marks. Enjoy your stretch-mark free body, you never appreciate how beautiful your skin is until it’s all ruined & wrecked.
Enjoy!!!
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This is such a powerful post! Thank you so much for sharing.
I thought that your comment that models have to be somewhat exhibitionists is quite telling… another “professional model” in his 70s made a similar comment on a post I wrote about modeling. I never responded because I didn’t want to concede his point, but I am proud of my body, features and flaws and all, and I appreciate the opportunity to share it with people. I can’t say that I’m not a little embarrassed to be scrutinized completely naked, but I find more enjoyment in nude modeling than embarrassment. Much more. I guess you’re right about models being exhibitionists, at least mildly so. You probably wouldn’t model nude if you didn’t want your naked body to be appreciated.
I’ve never understood why models change in a bathroom or behind a partition, since the room is going to be seeing you completely naked soon, so why bother with the initial privacy? 😉
Nude modeling is great for body acceptance. I think that it’s better than going to a nude beach or nude resort, because unlike in those environments, you’re the center of attention when you’re posing nude, ESPECIALLY for drawings or paintings, since the artists will note, scrutinize and examine pretty much every thing about your body, features and flaws. Nude modeling forces you to publicly come to terms with any sense of naked vulnerability that you have, especially if you post the work that was done on the internet.
Well written post, and thank you for sharing your experience with us!
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I also disagree with the advice that you shouldn’t plan out your poses beforehand… that’s a great way to end up in a pose that you can’t hold for 20 minutes, or end up in a position where a limb falls asleep. I think extended poses need practice to make sure that they are doable!
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Many (MANY) years ago I went to art school in NYC. Naturally (no pun intended heh) some of the classes involved nude models. No one seemed embarrassed by seeing nude models and the models themselves seemed perfectly fine being nude in front of an entire class of strangers. It helped to ready my mind for becoming a nudist and at one time years later, after I had come out to everyone who knew me as my REAL ME, I took my shot at being a nude model in such classes at the local state college. Great experience…
Jacob Drake
Author, “Chronicles of a Bare Naked Nudist”
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Intriguing….a great read….Thank you.
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I know this posting is not recent, but I’ve just discovered this blog and wanted to chime-in. I’ve been a figure model for over 4 years now and have worked with hundreds of classes, groups and private artists, but I still remember very well how it felt before and after the first time I posed for a group. Something I also came to in my middle-age.
I remember my very first time posing, I had visited the group for one of their sessions about a month earlier, and I had sat-in and observed a few other figure drawing/painting sessions at other places too, so I had a good idea what was expected, and what I could expect too. I’d visited websites with advice for new models, and checked-out sites with examples of models in various poses. But, what stuck in my mind was a woman who called into a radio show about 3 days before, who related a story of posing for an art class as a young college student where lots went wrong, making her nervousness much greater and she ended up passing-out in the middle of her first pose! I broke my own nervousness by telling this story to the group where I was posing and things went just fine.
Something that has always bothered me is that while many male models have continued posing well into later years, or, like me, began their modeling career in middle age, so many females stop modeling when they are not quite the swimsuit-figure model anymore. Most of the time when I have posed with a female model, it has been a young woman 15-20 years younger than me. I do know a very few women who’ve kept modeling into their 40’s, 50’s, or even 60’s, and even one or two who started in their 40’s, but it is certainly rare. There is one very notable woman who, after modeling as a college student, continued or returned to it later in life after having children and showing scars from surgeries (including breast re-construction,) and posed for a college near where she now lives. The professors she works with have called her the bravest woman they know, and she is quite at ease in front of a class. I wish this were something more women would allow themselves to experience. I think most might find there is more interest in working with them as a model than they ever imagined. I think you probably agree.
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I also model nude for the experience of being naked with the nothing to hide factor ever present. I actually feel totally recharged and relaxed by the process. Much the same reason I enjoy nudism, being alone does not work for me, but when with a group regardless of the activity it is such a relaxing feeling not even a vacation can produce the same results. Which brings me to the real point of this comment,
Montreal sucks when it comes to nudist activities and places to enjoy ourselves with others. The FQN is more of a business and does poorly in initiating ongoing and weekly events. Nudist places around our city far too often slam the door on men in fear I suppose of prowling, or some other obscene notion that totally flies against the fundamentals of nudism.
I am not alone on this for sure, but why is there no outcry? Why does one have to sneak about to find a spot in the sun?
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Hi, Lance. Good to have you here.
I’m not sure what’s up with Montreal. Although I live in the Montreal area, I am a member of the Ontario Naturists group — which doesn’t slam the door on anyone.
I have been to the clothing-optional section on Oka Beach, and it is quite pleasant. But as for Quebec naturism groups, I can’t really comment: I am not fully bilingual enough to go to their activities.
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BRAVA!!! Very *VERY* nice Jillian!!
You are *so right* when you say this is a wonderful empowering experience – I have modeled several times figure drawing classes at one of our local colleges, and it has been one of the highlights of my life: a major help in my body acceptance as a transgender woman. As an artist myself, I love the collaboration that can occur between artist and model. Life modeling is something I will definitely continue to do as opportunities present themselves, AND it’s a nice bit of spice for my CV to! (“Life modeling?? What’s THAT???”)
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I know this is an old post but I had to reply. Wow!
I have done a lot of nude modeling over my life. Then I got real work and dropped off the modeling scene for the last 3+ decades. I was about to get back into it as a source of retirement income but COVID-19 intervened
It really is just a matter of being comfortable in your own skin. When I turned 18 and went off to college was my first opportunity at “social” nudity in the form of modeling. It was the mid-70s. No nudist club would let me anywhere near the gates but college campuses were extremely liberal. I understand many campuses today have their figure models wear g-strings or even swimwear.
My head was full of preconceptions that turned out to be wildly optimistic. The room was crowded, the illumination was a huge window facing north at sidewalk level (!!!) and my space was a small raised platform. No changing room, I undressed right there. It was Michigan in the fall and the temperature was only comfortable for the people who were dressed.
Without boring you with the details, the very first time I had about as close to a panic attack as I’ve ever come. I persevered and soon settled in. Working conditions improved, including using spotlights instead of the window for lighting which also warmed things up. (I wonder if the art professor was getting complaints from management?) I ended up posing for 3 different classes that year on a regular basis.
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I can certainly relate to your experience, though I always had a small room to change in. I never made any money doing it, but it sure boosted my self-confidence and self-esteem. And for a while there, I had visions of something far grander for a modelling career. lol. That never happened, but it was good to be able to entertain those thoughts. Supermodel Jillian! hahaha. So much fun.
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